Why they'll never let me write Spider-Man, Part 3: Black Widow

What about Marvel Cinematic Universe Spidey meeting up with the Black Widow? We know Widow's no nonsense, and Spidey is, well, ALL nonsense. How might that play out? 

Spider-Man: "So you're Black Widow."
Black Widow: "Yes." 
Spider-Man: "Like the spider?" 
Black Widow: "Yes. And before you say anything, I was Black Widow when your aunt was still making your dinner for you." 
Spider-Man: "My aunt still makes my dinner for me. But that's, y'know, beside the point. Do you have spider powers?"
Black Widow: "What?"
Spider-Man: "Spider powers. Stick to walls? Shoot webs?" 
Black Widow: "No. Stop talking." 
Spider-Man: "Spider sense alerting you to danger?" 
Black Widow: "You realize actual spiders don't have 'spider-sense,' right? Also stop talking." 
Spider-Man: "So why call yourself Black Widow? Why not Secret Agent Something Something?" 
Black Widow: "Because female black widows have deadly poison and kill male spiders." 
Spider-Man: "Kill male spiders?" 
Black Widow: "And sometimes eat them." 
Spider-Man: "You said something about stop talking?" 
Black Widow: "I did." 
Spider-Man. "I'm going to do that now." 
‪#‎whytheyllneverletmewritespiderman‬

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